coiffeur | HOLLY HEIGHTS INBOX

[ his facade slowly crumbles, and he shakes his head in silence, fingers clumsily groping over koujaku's leg until he finds his arm. he curls his hand around it, trying to avoid the lunchbox he's holding. ]

I-- [ his voice cracks. ] I can't see.

[ he'd been in a right panic when his sight was suddenly stolen, at first thinking that maybe it'd just pass. then time dragged on, and he did his best to quell his anxiety, but... ]

Koujaku, my eyes--

[ he almost drops the food, but sets it down on the coffee table nearby. what? no this... his heart sinks because seeing him in pain is the last thing Koujaku wants for Aoba. they've been so happy lately, he's been so happy. is this his fault? did his selfish happiness cause this? he'll think about that later because Aoba needs his help. ]

You can't see? [ he reaches out towards Aoba's face, but retracts his hand. ]

[ that retracted hand forms a fist and he hits the couch. his nails dig into his palms, and he can't help the rage building. he knows what's happened, he's pretty sure now. this is one of the landlord's tricks, and while he's not been pleased about many things, hurting Aoba like this... he hurt him before, and he swore if that bastard hurt Aoba again -- emotionally or physically -- he'd pay. ]

That motherfucker. [ he gets out, hissing almost. he's seething with rage. this man's games, he doesn't mind them being done to him, but Aoba is another story. ] This is one of his tricks, but he's not going to get away with this.

[ clutching his arm like a lifeline, aoba flinches when he feels the impact of koujaku's fist on the couch. this is exactly what he didn't want happening. plus, from what he's heard through words of mouth, things like this happened from time to time, and usually didn't last. at least, he's fervently hoping that it doesn't. he'd thought himself lucky because nothing had happened so far.

determined not to let the last vestiges of his composure collapse, aoba raises his other hand and tries to locate koujaku's face by the sound of his voice. he misses, but catches what feels like his shoulder instead. fingers flexing down lightly on it, aoba's face knits itself into a look of concern. it's unlike koujaku to lose his temper like this, and it unsettles him. ]

No! [ his voice is rising. ] No, I mean, remember what you said? We should just keep our heads low for now. It probably won't last too long...

[ right? ] I can deal with it until then.

[ Aoba's yelling snaps him back, and then there's sense of utter guilt. he put himself before Aoba again. his rage took over him, and now he's making it worse. he needs to think about what Aoba needs right now. this is about Aoba, not him. whatever he feels he can deal with later. ]

Shit, Aoba, I'm sorry. I just- [ He doesn't deserve an excuse. ] That was stupid and selfish of me. I'm sorry. [ his body releases the tension it was holding, and he leans towards Aoba so their foreheads are pressed together. ] I don't deserve to be forgiven, and you're right. I'll find a way to help you get your sight back somehow. [ he pulls his head back a little and kisses Aoba's forehead. ] I'll help you through this, and I'm not leaving your side until your vision is back. [ his voice gets a little softer. ] I'll love you no matter what, and if I could, I'd give up my ability to see if it meant having you see again right now.

[ he understands why koujaku gets upset. aoba would be too, if this happened to him. none of this is either of their faults, though, and he won't let koujaku blame himself for it. ]

It's okay. [ he closes his eyes, comforted by the touch. ] Don't blame yourself, you didn't know this would happen-- I'll be fine with you here. And I definitely wouldn't want this happening to you either, okay?

[ a pause, and he makes an attempt at a joke to break some of the tension in the air. ] As long as you don't follow me into the washroom. [ like he said the other day... there's still a line!! ]

[ hearing Aoba say it's going to be okay, while he's hesitant to believe it right away, eventually he nods and trusts him. either way, he'd find a way to make things better for Aoba no matter what it took, so causing Aoba to worry even more and cause him more pain is something he doesn't want to do. he brushes a few strands of hair from Aoba's face tenderly, staring at his eyes. ] Alright. [ still, he feels like he's partly responsible at the very least, but he won't tell Aoba that. ]

[ he laughs at the joke, smiling. ] I'll wait outside like I did last time, and I didn't peak like you said. [ but on a more serious note. ] I'll take care of dinner and the house work until you get better, so don't worry about it.

Thanks. I'll leave it in your hands then...

[ and hope that they don't all starve from this little episode. still, how bad could it be.

his eyes-- well they don't look any different from normal, amber and opened wide as though that might somehow help him see again.

tucking his head against the crook of koujaku's shoulder, aoba curls himself up on his lap, indulging himself a bit selfishly. it's been a long day to say the least, and there's something both familiar and reassuring about his presence. koujaku...he feels like home to aoba.

he doesn't say anything else. ]

[ wow he'll pick up take out and be a very good head of the household while Aoba is out of commission. Anyway, when he sees those eyes, it stings a little as they're showing his emotions. He holds Aoba close wrapping his arms around him securely. maybe it's his way of reassuring the other he means what he said about being there for him and protecting him. being with him like this, it makes him feel more alive than ever, like he really has a grounded purpose. aoba's the one who connects him to the world, so having this mutual affection, he's still unsure if he's worthy of this happiness. ]

If you don't give in, I won't. I promise.

[ the phrase strikes a chord in him, and aoba lets out a breath he didn't realise he'd been holding. the tension drains from his muscles. he goes lax in koujaku's hold, shifting to press his lips gently against koujaku's neck. he can't help but recall their childhood together, and the way koujaku comforts him just like he always did. ]

I won't. [ he has a hard time finding koujaku's hand like this, and settles for grasping his arm again, smiling faintly at him. ] It's a promise.

Edited 2013-12-17 07:24 (UTC)

[ he closes his own eyes now, enjoying the moment. he's never felt this comfortable around anyone but Aoba. the rage and tension he held just a few minutes ago is replaced by a calmness brought on by being with him. ]

Aoba, can we stay like this, just for a bit? [ his voice isn't as confident before, but he's not noticeably nervous -- just a little awkward as he's still getting used to things. ] I just want to cherish us like this for longer.

Is it okay? Your legs...won't they go numb? [ he's more than willing to stay camped on the couch, snug with koujaku like this, but if a certain someone starts losing circulation...

it's strange-- to think that only a few days ago they were still toeing the lines of friendship. and now koujaku's become someone closer and dearer to his heart than ever before. "cherish us"... aoba can kind of understand now why women are always swooning over koujaku's lines now. the way he says it too, all soft and slightly uncertain makes aoba's heart skip a beat. ]

[ at Aoba, comment, he laughs a few times softly. ] Maybe, but if it happens, I'll deal with it later.

[ he kisses the side of Aoba's head and smiles. ] It's cute you're concerned about me like that. [ it's true, and maybe it comes off as teasing just a little (intentional or not, who knows). ] Just tell me if your legs start falling asleep.

It's not cute, I'm just worried! [ an indignant frown, and he pokes koujaku in the ribs in retort.

thanks for ruining the moment, koujaku. feathers ruffled, aoba's still scowling, but he stays where he is with his legs splayed against and over koujaku's. ]

You worrying is cute. [ and he counters that frown because he's smiling like an idiot even with getting poked. he squeezes Aoba a bit tighter because he knows that tone of voice. ] It shows that you care about me, and for that, I'm thankful for.

Of course I care about you. [ mutinous grumbling!! koujaku, always the voice of reason. it makes it difficult for aoba to argue with him. ] But things like that-- telling me I'm cute and stuff... You don't have to say it all the time.

I know. [ in his head he finishes that thought. I know, but I don't know if I'm worthy of it. ] I can't help it. I see you being cute, and then I just get the urge to say it. [ not exactly true because he thinks it so much, but there sometimes he can't resist. ]

Is it really that bad for me to say I think you're cute? [ his voice changes as he whispers into Aoba's ear. ] Or maybe I should say sexy instead? You're that, too.

It's embarrassing. Besides, I'm a guy. Hearing something like that... can't you say I'm cool instead?

[ he jolts, a shiver running down his spine. it must be because he can't see right now that koujaku's voice has that kind of effect on him. especially when he speaks right next to his ear like that. ] Definitely not.

It's just us, so you don't have to be embarrassed. [ cool? oh Aoba... ] I don't think it has the same effect, but when you do look cool, I'll tell you. [ he thinks Aoba does look pretty cool, actually, but it really doesn't get the same reaction. ]

Really? [ he can tell what he did had a very strong reaction. ] I think sexy works well.

What do you mean, when I look cool-- and that's not a good reason at all! [ he is totally cool, excuse me.

...

koujaku's teasing him, and he doesn't need eyes to tell him that. he realises in this moment that all he can hear and feel around him is koujaku-- his voice, the warmth of his body, his scent. skin prickling, aoba shifts uncomfortably. ] Yeah, well I don't think so.

[ he laughs because this is actually pretty adorable. ] What if I say you're cute and cool at the same time? That's a fair trade, isn't it?

Then there's one thing we have to agree to disagree about. [ he closes his eyes again, almost resting as he takes in this time together. with his eyes closed, some of his senses seem more sensitive; is this how Aoba has been feeling? Did you still want to have some dinner? Letting it get cold, it'd be a waste.

I don't know, it sounds like you're just trying to make a lame compromise.

[ how can someone be so utterly infuriating!! it's like koujaku's special trait, or aoba's own feelings towards him, probably. ]

It's fine, we can heat it up later. [ he's in the mood for something else. shifting in koujaku's lap so he's facing him, aoba tentatively slides his fingers across his face, mapping the curve of his cheek and the line of his nose with them. the slightly raised skin of the scar that arcs over his face. his lips...

aoba leans in and kisses them. ]

[ Aoba taking the initiative, he actually finds it sexy but he's not used to it. he's going to say something when Aoba feels his face, and then he remembers, he can't see. his heart starts to race because he knows what's connected to those scars but the other doesn't. he can't see his tattoos, and part of him worries if Aoba touches them, they'll somehow drag him down. he feels so vulnerable and exposed, but it's not in a bad way. he's about to mutter something out when he's kissed. he kisses him back without hesitation and taking his time. he brings up one of his hands and twirls some of Aoba's hair around his fingers. he's still really careful about touching his hair, though, as he's used to thinking it's very sensitive. ]

[ can't let koujaku do all the leading around here, right? besides, aoba's not the kind of guy who would let him do all the work anyway. unaware of koujaku's reservations about him touching his tattoos or any part of him, aoba keeps himself precariously balanced as he draws his hands lower, letting his fingers be his eyes. they graze the soft strands of koujaku's ponytail, before dipping lower to flatten his palms over his chest.

aoba can feel his heartbeat beneath skin and bone.

slowly deepening the kiss, tipping his head to nip at koujaku's mouth playfully, he registers the feeling of koujaku's hands in his hair as something pleasant and surprisingly intimate. ]

[ at Aoba feeling his heartbeat, he briefly pauses because he does try to act cool in front of him, but then in moments like this, he's just himself, and that's actually something he's getting used to. he's so in love it's easy to trust Aoba -- a lot easier than before. not that he didn't trust him before, but having Aoba say and show he loves and cares for him, he can't help but get swept up in this all.

when the kiss turns more playful, he can't help but smile even while kissing. it makes him shift away from thinking too much about the scars and the marks on his body. he nips back, but on Aoba's upper lip before he starts kissing him again, a lot more passionately than before. he's getting pretty worked up over kissing which he thinks is embarrassing, but it's Aoba, so he's not too ashamed. he breaks the kiss, trying to compose himself a little and calm himself down. ]

If this keeps going...

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